The Catflap of Correction

May 12, 2002

Egyptian Cat Goddess unbastardized

Godly correction alert: A concerned feline fan from New Zealand points out that Egyptian Cat Goddess BASTET is really the bastardized version of BAST – and not the other way round.

We knew it all along. Honestly we did. We were just the victims of an intellectual cat-fight. But now, delving deep into our resources, we’ve come up with *proof* that BAST is her proper name. It’s all to do with hieroglyphic confusion and alphabetic pollution. Go here for a precis.

By a Godly quirk of fate, we were just reading about missing half cats in the new book by Douglas Adams. It’s all his fault.

Big thanks to Jaqueline for bringing the matter to our reluctant attention. We’ve updated the Holy Database’s BAST article just for you – and our millions of loyal readers.

No-one is immune. There’s even a bastardized version of Jacqueline’s name – Jax  🙂


Wonderful news from Lithuania!

May 9, 2002

A flood of new Gods

Extra special thanks to site visitor Rainer for sending more Gods our way.

Rainer tells us that the Gods of Lithuania are alive and well, and being worshipped under the mantle of Romuva. Furthermore, the habit has now spread to America.

The pagan religion of Lithuania contains many interesting Gods – including a God of Beer and a God of Marijuana. (No God of Chocolate though.)

This inspiring news has caused us to pore (rather than paw) over ancient maps and peer into history books – to find that Lithuania has always done its own thing.

The last country in Europe to accept Christianity, Lithuania has managed to keep its own language, not get poleaxed by the Poles, or be pushed out by Prussia. It still retains its own customs and identity, as a republic of Russia. The boundaries once spread from the Baltic to the Black Sea, including the Ukraine and large chunks of Western Russia. So know you know.

With our Deity Database being such an ongoing thing, the Slavic section will be undergoing a revamp to include many additional Lithuanian and Latvian Gods. Chas feels that Lithuanian mythology could be significant enough to warrant a whole new section in our database. We’ve done some preliminary research, and are now looking for genuine Lithuanian beer to give us further inspiration.

Big thanks to Rainer for tipping us off.

Line Dancing Planets – Special Report

May 7, 2002

Astrology is right after all!

The Roman Planet Suite is at its peak. (See our original story here.)

Godchecker’s CEO, Chas Saunders, put the Gods to the test by risking life and limb in a trip to the seaside. He reports:

It is TRUE! The queues are shorter in supermarkets. (We avoided supermarkets for two weeks so the queues were, ipso facto, reduced. QED.)

And trains have run on time! A journey to Eastbourne, involving five connections, dovetailed perfectly. There was only one slight delay – caused by a distracted signalman gazing at the heavens. However, there were no planets visible as it was the middle of the day. How we smiled and chortled.

There was no sign of road rage, although we used a bus.

We did eschew McDonalds – I’m sure there is one in Eastbourne, but the Gods directed us to the Marine Pub where the burgers are succulent and specially made to a sacred bovine recipe.

What’s more, there’s now a Villa & Hut Godshop at 44 South Street. We raved about their branch in Brighton, and hope to visit their store in Australia as part of our Godchecker World Tour any decade now. (Villa & Hut sell all manner of authentic Godly statues and furniture, handcarved by devout wood-lovers in Bali. Their website is here. Tell them we sent you.)

We were then compelled to purchase five out-of-print Godly volumes from an antique bookstore – so necessary for our research.

And to finish the day, our corner store had exactly five bottles of Praga, our precious and rare Slavic brew.