Feed of the Gods

January 22, 2011

The Godchecker Technical Kludge Department is pleased to announce the relaunch of our official Twitter feed.

Our boffins have been working hard behind the scenes without the benefit of sleep, cake or any formal training in health and safety to bring your your daily Godfix. Head over to http://twitter.com/Godchecker.

Also in the pipeline is a Facebook feed. If you are interested in such a thing, let us know!

 

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Pope Idol or the Hawking and Dawkins Show?

October 3, 2010

These days we have the X Factor Competition between the Omnipotence of POPE IDOL and the HAWKING & DAWKINS BIG BANG SHOW.

The Good Old Gods tried and tested from time immemorial suffer sadly from neglect.

The Christian and Atheist Cultures have ignored or are disinclined to believe in two of the fundamentals of Human Faith : a sense of humour and a right to choose.

Beliefs should come in a wide variety and you should be able to pick what suits you rather than having opinions forced upon you. When selecting from the God Market you should be able to exchange or get refunds on faulty deities or worships that don’t work. Think of our modest volume as a catalogue. You should also go for special offers. Try one and get one Free – or Three for the Price of One.

Finally we have it on good authority that many of our Gods do not believe the the existence of Richard Dawkins, Scientology or humans unable to notice sunsets.
As for a God who thinks he is the One and Only – how is he ever going to cope with democracy?


Jesus did NOT die on cross, claims scholar

June 24, 2010


Jesus may not have died nailed to the cross because there is no evidence that the Romans crucified prisoners two thousand years ago, a scholar has claimed.

The legend of his execution is based on the traditions of the Christian church and artistic illustrations rather than antique texts, according to theologian Gunnar Samuelsson.

He claims the Bible has been misinterpreted as there are no explicit references the use of nails or to crucifixion – only that Jesus bore a ‘staurus’ towards Calvary which is not necessarily a cross but can also mean a ‘pole’. Full story at the Telegraph.

Us Godcheckers are left wondering. Jesus never went near a cross – it was a pole. So how did he die then? Hit over the head with it? Impaled? A terrible pole-vaulting accident?

In case you’re wondering, the scholar in question is a devout Christian. We urge him to complete his research and track down the missing murder weapon before anyone else gets injured.


Godchecker the Third

June 21, 2010

Today, on the very pinnacle of the Summer Solstice, we unleash the brand new Godchecker site on an unsuspecting interweb.

This is the third major version of Godchecker since we began back in 1999. The first version was embarrassingly primitive, but the second was quite clever for its time, even sporting pseudo Web 2.0 features – before Web 2.0 was even invented.

It’s been our aim to revamp the site for a while. A lot has changed since the last upgrade. Gone are the days of browser wars and incompatibility hell; now there are such things as widescreen monitors, iPads and CSS3. What a wonderful thing is technology. We thank all the Gods for inventing it.

Please let us know what you think of the new look site. We will be adding more bits and pieces over the next few weeks, so your feedback will really help us. If there’s anything you love or hate, let us know!


Act of God: Jesus zapped by lightning bolt

June 15, 2010

The calm before the storm - Jesus in happy times. Click for larger pic

A huge statue of Jesus Christ in Monroe, Ohio, USA was struck by lightning and destroyed during a thunderstorm yesterday night.

The six story statue, built next to the not entirely aptly-named Solid Rock Church, was the idea Church founder and former horse trader Lawrence Bishop and his wife.

The 'Beacon of Hope' - Click for larger view.

The $250,000 statue was intended to be a ‘beacon of hope’, but after being struck by lightning it became a rather more conventional beacon with searing flames and smoke etc. It is now more or less obliterated.

We are left wondering how the quarter of a million dollars insurance claim will fare. This was indeed the ultimate Act of God…

Original story here.

More dramatic pics can be found here.


Discovered: Loki and Medusa’s dinosaur lovechild

June 4, 2010

Artist's rendering of Medusaceratops. (Copyright Luis Rey)

Michael J. Ryan of The Cleveland Museum of Natural History has announced the discovery of a new kind of horned dinosaur named after hideous Greek gorgon Medusa and Loki the infamous Norse Trickster God.

Approx 20 feet long and weighing more than two tons, Medusaceratops Lokii was a plant-eating dinosaur living nearly 78 million years ago during the Late Cretaceous period in what is now Montana, USA.

Its identification marks the discovery of a new genus of horned dinosaur. Medusaceratops had giant 3 feet long brow bones and a large, shield-like frill off the back of its skull adorned with large curling hooks. The name refers to the thickened, fossilized, snake-like hooks on the side of the frill. Medusa the Gorgon had a full head of hair consisting of horrible wriggling snakes, which were ugly enough to turn any onlookers to stone.

Medusaceratops Lokii means ‘Loki’s horn-faced Medusa’.This particular example was named after Loki, the Norse God of mischief, because the new dinosaur initially caused scientists some confusion. Loki is well-known amongst Godcheckers for producing some pretty nasty offspring. However his newly-discovered dinosaur child seems quite unique and strange. Typical Loki behavior¬† really.
Read the story in full at Science Daily.


Bouncey Gods: Mesoamericans invented rubber balls

June 1, 2010

Rubber Soul: Aztec God Xiuhtecuhtli playing with his rubber balls. Note the awesome sneakers. Click for larger view.

New research from MIT indicates that pre-Columbian peoples, including the Aztecs, Olmecs and Maya, were advanced rubber chemists.

By processing the sap from local rubber trees and fine-tuning it with other ingredients, an extraordinary variety of rubber materials were created.

For the soles of their sandals, they made a strong, wear-resistant rubber. For the balls used in their famous religious games, they processed it for maximum bounciness. And for rubber bands and adhesives used for ornamental wear, they produced rubber optimized for resilience and strength.

An Aztec football pitch.

It turns out that rubber production was much more advanced in Mesoamerican times than was previously thought, and the rest of civilisation’s budding football teams had to be content with kicking pig bladders around until the rubber renaissance of Charles Goodyear’s vulcanisation process in 1839.

We are busy checking our archives for Rubber Gods. Rubber balls and other bouncey items from antiquity have already been found. Now the search is on for a genuine pair of Aztec sneakers with rubber souls.

Original story from MIT here.